Tuesday, June 24, 2008

I'm a bad blog owner

It has been over a month since my last blog...please forgive me!! Life has been crazy busy with the onset of nicer weather. We've been spending time with family and friends, grilling, playing softball, taking long walks, swimming and lying under the trees with our princess. Also...I've been working hard to get Sweet Sentiments off the ground. I just got my first big order yesterday...150 candy bars!! I'm so excited! I've done about 5-6 small orders and things are going well. On to less boring topics...

In a few short weeks our little princess will be turning 1! I'm excited and sad all at the same time. I just can't believe how fast she has grown and what a little person she is! Jaelynn is a very spirited little girl...read...ornery....but we wouldn't have it any other way. Saturday marked her first attempt at pulling up and it was successful. Now she enjoys pulling up on most anything and standing and clapping. Another new development....attempts at crawling! She has been scooting on her bottom for about a month. I really need to get that on tape because she is just so funny. Sunday she got on all fours and started rocking back and forth and was able to move...just a little! And of course she is still chattering up a storm. New favorite phrases...No and what sounds like Mine. Also momma and dadda. It has been about 3 weeks now since we made the switch to whole milk and no bottle. She actually gave up the bottle without a fight. Just one more step to becoming a big girl!

I count my blessing every day for our little girl. Jaelynn is truly the light of my life. I tip toe into her room at night and stand by her crib and just watch her sleep. She is untouched by this world and I wish I could keep her this safe forever. As we begin thinking about expanding our family I look back and hope that I have remembered everything from Jaelynn's first year. I look at her now and can still feel her kicking me just days before giving birth. I watch her climb on her swing and remember how tiny she was when we first put her in there. When she falls asleep on Kevin I can still see the newborn that fit so nicely on his chest...now she sprawls halfway across his body. I remember waking up in the middle of the night to nurse and realize I didn't mind it that much. As she gets older I start to forget about the hours of crying and the sleepless nights. I forget how big I was the last few weeks I carried her. She is becoming my big girl.....she is almost officially a toddler......God help us all.......

Thursday, May 15, 2008

The First of Many

Mommy and Princess J

When you become a mommy you get the joy of experiencing all of your child's "firsts". Most of these are a joyous and will bring a tear to your eye because your baby is growing up. As a mommy, I have realized that my days of being selfish are over and that everything I do now revolves around Jaelynn. However...one day a year....mom's can be selfish and not feel guilty. That wonderful day is Mother's Day!

My first Mother's Day was perfect! It actually started Saturday when Kevin, who is terrible about holding onto gifts, handed me a card from Jaelynn. Inside was the best gift...a 1 hour full body massage. This momma needs that!

Mother's Day dawned bright and early....6:30 am to be exact! But instead of dragging myself out of bed to change a diaper and fix a bottle, Kevin got up! He took care of Jaelynn and brought her back to bed and we all fell back asleep for a couple more hours. I got the pleasure of waking up to my daughter touching my face and smiling at me. After a quick bath, Jaelynn and I were sitting in her room chatting and Kevin came back upstairs...armed with coffee and toast for me! He told me to get back in bed and have my breakfast. Let me tell you...this man makes a mean cup of coffee!

So, our original plan was to go to the zoo. However, Iowa weather threw us another curve ball and it was too cool to go to the zoo. I was bummed out but not for long. My mom came up to spend the day with us and that always makes me happy. Mom, Jaelynn and I decided to head to Des Moines for lunch and a little light shopping. Another highlight of the day was purchasing a much needed new grill and having Kevin's family over for dinner.

All in all my first Mother's Day was perfect. I can't wait until Jaelynn is old enough to make me cards herself and bring me burnt toast in bed. I know that she didn't fully understand why Sunday was so special to me or why I kept tearing up but one day she will. However, Kevin did a wonderful job of filling in for her until she is older. He made me feel special all day! I'm already starting to plan Father's Day!

Monday, May 5, 2008

Isn't it fitting?

I didn't post last week because I just wasn't in a very good frame of mind. I was having a really hard time working last week and having to leave my baby at daycare. I just really wanted to stay home with her last week and it is no surprise that I feel the same way this week. I'm pursuing some avenues right now that will hopefully allow me to stay home by the end of the year. More about those things later.

What I really want to write about is how amazing God is! How He knows when there is something weighing heavy on my heart and sends me right where I need to be. Today it was in the form of scripture and devotion. Other days it is a kind word or a song.

I was reading my daily devotion (finally got my bible back!!) on my lunch break. Today was about the Impossible Dream. I read Mathew 1:14-25. In a nutshell this passage talks about the dream Joseph had where the Angle of God came to him and told him the child Mary was carrying was to be the child of God. Not to shame her but to marry her and raise the child as his own and to call him Jesus. The devotion talked about the turmoil Joseph must have felt about this. What would it be like to raise Jesus and would he always be faced with the whispers about Mary. Anyway....at one point the Angel said "Do not be afraid". You know what...I am afraid. That is one of the reasons I have just talked about starting a business and not doing it. I'm afraid that my desire to stay home is just that...my desire...not God's plan for me. I pray about it and ask God to open up doors for me but then I look away when a door opens because I don't know if God opened it or if I opened it. The bible also says with God all things are possible. If I'm really meant to do this and I believe then I will succeed. I do believe that God wants me to stay home. I believe that if He wanted me in the work place then He would take this desire away from me. So I just need to believe and pray that all of this will work out in the end.

Isn't it neat how sometimes the answers are right there?

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Jaelynn Update!!

Yesterday afternoon we had Jaelynn's 9 month check up and pre-op appointment. I am happy to report that all is well!! She weighed in at a hefty 19.4 pounds and is 28 inches long. Yikes!! 2 more inches before she out grows the bucket seat!! She is still in the 50th percentile but has followed her growth curve wonderfully. She got the all clear to have her tubes done Friday and we are ready! We have 2 more teeth working their way through...that would explain the runny nose and crankiness! Dr. Amy told me that whenever we wanted to ditch the bottle to go ahead. Last night we started taking the steps to do that and Jaelynn didn't mind one bit.

I had been concerned because Peanut Pie isn't crawling or scooting that much yet. I'm not so worried anymore! Dr. Amy said that she could be a little behind because of being sick so much this winter and she was just under 3 weeks early. If she doesn't start getting more mobile after the tubes we are going to have an Early Assessor come and observe her to see if she needs PT....but I don't think we will need that.

I also got some really good information on some vaccinations that are coming up and extended rear facing. Kevin and I decided that we are for sure going to do extended rear facing with Jaelynn. In Iowa you can front face your child after 20 pounds and 1 year. We have decided to get a car seat that will allow us to rear face until Jaelynn is 35 pounds. We have also considered switching her to front facing around 18 months but at this time I just don't feel that she is ready.

I also got some work done on the scrapbook last night. Two full pages and I have layout ideas for another 4. I just need to print some pictures off now! So for today I'll leave you with this....little miss on her 9 month birthday showing off her two teeth!!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Scrap Happy

Last night after the little one went to sleep and my shows were over I tackled more cleaning. I was picking up the room and got a little distracted...big surprise. My scrapbook tote was sitting in the corner...neglected and sad. So I carried it over to the bed and started sorting through everything. Oh what memories.....

When I was pregnant my wonderful friends threw me a scrapbook baby shower. It was a wonderful idea. All of my guest made scrapbook pages that were ready for pictures. In theory.....this makes things easy. I take a picture, print it and attach to appropriate page. However, I haven't touched my scrapbook since I was pregnant. The last entry was at 27 weeks. I need to get this caught up because Jaelynn is now 9.5 months old.

I'm working on making a life style change right now and am going to lean on my scrapbooking. I am going to commit to one page a night. I know that once I get going again I'll be able to do more and be caught up by the time princess turns 1. This will also help keep my mind distracted so I don't turn to food and I can hole myself up in our room when I start to feel bitchy. It will be a very good thing.

On another quick note...Jaelynn has her 9 month check-up this afternoon and pre-op appointment. I'll update her stats tomorrow. Have a peaceful day!

Monday, April 21, 2008

Spring Cleaning

I have been doing a lot of spring cleaning and baby proofing the last couple of weeks. Today I decided to not only spring clean my home but also my mind...on a regular basis. So I have decided to join the ranks and become a blogger. What I write about may not interest you but I'm okay with that. It won't always be a wonderful tale but it is my life and let's face it...my life isn't that interesting. I'm sure I will write about my husband and daughter too much and I'll mention people that don't mean anything to you at all but oh well. I want to put my life in writing and this is the best way I know how. So go grab something cold to drink and sit down and enjoy the crazy life of me!

Friday, February 29, 2008

A test of faith

I am a Christian woman. A few years ago I faltered on my walk with God. I didn't stop believing, I was just in the mindset that what God wanted for me wasn't what I wanted so I went my own way. I have recently started going back to church and reading my bible and praying more. I feel a peace when I talk to God and I feel that my walk with Him makes me a better wife, mother and friend.

I feel like I am a newborn in Christ again and feel like my faith is being tested often. About 6 weeks ago Jaelynn got very sick. She had ear infection and broncilitis. She was put on antibiotics and a nebulizer for a little over a week. Thankfully everything cleared up and she bounced back wonderfully. Shortly after that my little princess was once again not feeling well and spiking fevers out of the blue. So back to the doctor we went and Jaelynn was diagnosed with sinus infection and another ear infection. Another 10 days of antibiotics and she was fine.

Last week Kevin came down with influenza and Jaelynn started with the fevers again. I took them both back to the doctor and Kevin was put on meds and Jaelynn was fine. Chest was clear and ears were fine. So we got her fever to break and she was my happy baby again. During this time I talked to my dad and step-mom who were believing with me for health. They also told me that I need to take authority over my household. So while my husband and daughter slept I prayed.

We had a terrible night Wednesday. Very little sleep and lots of crying. I honestly thought Jaelynn was teething. I prayed for comfort and peace in her body and gave her all sorts of teething meds but nothing seemed to help. My faith was very shaken. I believe very much in the power of prayer and have prayed over Jaelynn since the day she was born. I pray for my family and friends everyday. I believe that God does answer prayer....so why was it not working the other night. I think it was because I was so tired and had put myself into a negative frame of mind. Instead of going to God first I went to him as a last resort to fix my problem but didn't think he really would. Jaelynn spiked a fever again yesterday and back to the doctor we went. She has double ear infection and is now on meds....again. We go back in 10 days for a check-up and may possibly have to go see a specialist about tubes.

She slept much better last night but was still up a few times. At one point I lay in bed listening to her breath and realized she was breathing very rapidly and kind of shallow. My first instinct was to load everyone up and head to the ER. Instead I prayed. I prayed for healing in Jaelynn's body and wisdom for me to make the right decisions. While I was praying visions of Jaelynn in the hospital were running through my head and I feared that I was making the wrong choice and might loose my baby. I asked God to help me. To give me peace in the decision not to run off to the ER and I demanded those thoughts out of my head. In just a few short minutes Jaelynn's breathing returned to normal and I felt at peace and was able to go to sleep without worry.

I know that my faith is being tested every day. As a mother I feel like I am always second guessing my decisions. Last night made me realize how much I need to lean on God and believe in what I am praying for. I read something the other day that really hit home with me. God doesn't promise smooth sailing, but he does promise a safe landing. He has not made my daughter sick and I need to lean on him and believe that she is healthy. I'm at peace with our check up in the next 10 days. I'm believing for a good report and that Jaelynn will not need to have tubes. I have faith in God and I believe that He will heal my daughter.

I just really felt the need to get this down today. Writing it helps me stand firm on my decision to trust God. I believe that by understanding that my faith will be tested I can be better equipped for when it happens. I will continue to pray over my family and I will trust in God for a good report.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Princess Update

It's been so long!

I just looked back and realized the last time I gave a Jaelynn update was 4 1/2 months!! So much has changed since then!

Jaelynn is now sitting up by herself! She is such a big girl. She loves to sit on the floor and play with her toys and talk to Zeke. She gets very serious when she talks to him....I think she is telling him she really wants to grab his tail! She isn't rolling over yet. Instead she falls forward to get on her belly! I have a feeling that when she starts crawling, walking will follow very quickly. She doesn't have any teeth yet but that isn't stopping her! She eats all 2nd foods and just started on 3rd foods. She has also had a little debbie snack cake, an english muffin and a bannana. She loves to feed herself. We have a huge mess to clean up when she is done but just too cute!

Lets see...what else.....Oh...she is up to 16.6 pounds and growing more every day. Jaelynn loves her sippy cup with juice and isn't so crazy about the bottle anymore. She is still sleeping through the night for the most part and really is just a joy to be around. We have had a few sicknesses that have scared me but we are on the road to being healthy...some warmer weather would help!

I love being a mom. As she gets older I've really had to keep myself in check. I thought it would get easier to drop her off at daycare and be away from her. I was so wrong. I've recently been going through a tough time but thanks to all the people in my life I'm finally starting to pull out of this rut. Here are a few things I'm trying to remember:
-Jaelynn loves me even though I work and she doesn't care that I haven't lost the extra weight.
-I need to take time for myself every once in awhile and just be me. I don't have to be super mom....I just have to be mom and wife.
-If things don't get done around the house but I get to play with Jaelynn for an hour that is okay.
-I need to shut off the mommy switch every once in awhile and be a wife to Kevin. I may not have the same body but he still thinks I'm sexy as hell!!

I'll try to be better about posting in the future!